daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
In the one day [livejournal.com profile] queenzulu is back in town between camping trips, we've forced her to watch Boa vs Python. And when I say forced, I make sarcastic little air-quotes around it with my fingers.

The premise of the movie: Okay, there's a giant python on the loose, and it's probably the fault of some big game hunter guy. (Except [livejournal.com profile] queenzulu said this from the next room, and I heard "big gay hooker." Which would have made a better movie.) The FBI's solution? To stop this python, let's send a giant boa after it! Yeah!

David Hewlett was the scientist guy who owned the boa. Which provided such brilliant (innuendo-free, no really) lines as "You want to do WHAT to MY boa?"

some more scintillating dialogue, as transcribed by queenzulu )

Heeeee. Yes, we're really that easily amused.
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
[livejournal.com profile] troutkitty is reading SG:A kidfic. (A Beautiful Lifetime Event by [livejournal.com profile] astolat, specifically. Which, to borrow a word from [livejournal.com profile] queenzulu, is blerking brilliant.)

I went out tonight to take back some library books and say hi to a friend who works at the closest branch.

Me: Back soon, just going to the library.

My girl, looking up all wide-eyed: I wanna baby.

Me: I'd bring you one, but all the babies at the library will belong to someone else who's not us.

My girl: Wanna baby.

(Needless to say, I did not come home with a baby. Or with any more books, but that was only in part due to the thirty or so I've got out that need to be read before they're due back, and mostly because I forgot my wallet.)

Now she's demanding more fic. Oh, dear.

*

Conversation from last Wednesday, or, a recounting of [livejournal.com profile] ming_lei's talk about reincarnation with her mother:

"Why are people always Chinese in their past lives? Couldn't you come back as a Swedish person?"

"Hell, no! Chinese person or bust! ... Or an animal."

"A Chinese animal? Like a horse? Couldn't you be a Swedish horse?" (insert bad Swedish accent here) "I am a horse from Sweden!"

... yeah. Maybe you had to be there. We also got to watch the police come and all. The one guy couldn't pay his two hundred dollar tab, and at one point, made a break for it up the stairs before the manager dragged him back. And then they took him out in cuffs because they found drug paraphenalia on him.

Usually, Wednesday nights aren't quite THAT eventful.

On aminor sidenote, I have all three parts of Fingersmith now! Yay! ([livejournal.com profile] queenzulu, want me to wait to watch it until you can come see it, too?)
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
"Gee, Karl, your breasts have gotten a lot more realistic."
...

"Yeah! Show us your breasts, Karl!" (as [livejournal.com profile] nekosei displays his sketchbook)

So yeah, about the usual level of Wednesday night silliness.

In other news, Dan sold me his old computer. Yay! It doesn't randomly freeze for several seconds at a time! It has five times the hard drive space and lots more the RAM and all that.

Bittorrent is being annoying and won't connect, and I'm still trying out how to migrate my mail on Thunderbird over (it's got oodles of support for switching from another mail program, but not for migrating from one copy to another, or backing it up or anything. Grr.)

(prods bittorrent experimentally. switches to bittornado.) Hmm. Still not connecting. But hey, it doesn't work for two seconds (literally) and then cause blue-screen-of-death, which is an improvement, lemme tell you.
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
I (heart) my Jaclyn!

I'm over at my friend Jacquie's--and we've known each other forever (since high school) and are beyond embarassment. *g* We made a trip to that venerable Canadian insitution, aka Tim Horton's, on a mission for iced cappucinos! Mmm... And Jacquie, strange person that she is, asked if they could make her one black. Which she's going to try next time. (We came to the conclusion that it would be REALLY good if you then added kaluha.)

So, she's been playing with those goofy-looking Bratz dolls. The ones with the big heads that look vaguely like Americanized anime characters. But Jacquie's been doing things like pulling out the hair and giving them new hair (afro!) and giving them piercings and stuff. One of them has a Matrix jacket and everything.

But the real reason I felt the need to proclaim that I (heart) my Jaclyn is, she's showing me the dolls, and points to one, and says "She's over here, acting straight. That's why she hangs out with the biker guy. But this one over here is really her girlfriend." And she sits her in the other girl-doll's lap, and hee, smoochies!

We then decided that the biker doll is also gay and he's going to have pierced nipples which will be chained to his boyfriend's leash. *snerk* (And the leash is all Jacquie's fault!) So now she needs to find another boy-doll to alter for his bf. And he's possibly going to be a transvestite.

I could blame the sugar and caffiene, but honestly, we're usually like this when you put us together.
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
First off, random quote-link-whatever: "Libraries are really the Napster of the hardcopy world." This bit of indignation comes from a letter in response to a CBC column about used book stores. Don't MAKE me use my what-a-library-is-good-for rant...

Amusing incident #1: When long-time friend Joan described to me a character from a book she was reading as a "gentleman of the slash persuasion."

Amusing incident #2: When you shut off our car, or more specifically, the radio, the antenna retracts and goes thump-thump-thump-thump. The first time Anna was in the car and heard this, she jumped and yelled, "What the hell was that?" [livejournal.com profile] troutkitty proceeded to reassure her that there was no body in the trunk. Anna made her get out (in -30C weather), open the trunk, and let her check. *g*

Yay-for-me news: going to do a trial book review for VOYA, as a volunteer reviewer.

Vaguely annoying news: This is Wonderland AND Rick Mercer's Monday Report were pre-empted by the stupid hockey game. And I think I'm getting a cold.

Re-reading American Gods. Neil Gaiman tells the best stories.
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
This week's quote from Rick Mercer's Monday Report (may not be exact):

"The Supreme Court has ruled that spanking does not violate the charter of rights and freedoms. That's all well and good, but I really think the Supreme Court should stay out of the nation's bedrooms."

Hee. And This is Wonderland continues to impress me. Love Nancy, the intern-type-person. They're showing an extra ep on Sun next week. Not sure if this is a good sign for the show or not...

[livejournal.com profile] troutkitty and I armed ourselves with bbq cornchips and wild cherry Coke tonight (because that was the designated snackfood of HCL fic writing when we first met) and rewatched HCL. The end goal is, of course, to get a certain couple of fics finished and posted. Because they've only been, y'know, all but done, for the past three frickin' years. And I keep saying that, but this time, really, I will post something.

Random thoughts:

- Aw! Slashy! Slashy! Hee! (but besides that...)

- Tiffany, uncredited red-haired girl who interviewed them early on, is not only the lead in Better than Chocolate but as also in an ep or two of Due South. She was one of the two snotty schoolgirls in "Some Like it Red," for one.

- In the acid trip scene, is that Bucky's wife Naomi smearing blood on his chest? Because I always thought it was. But Barb said she thought it was a guy.

- "How'd you get this... sexy scar on your hand?" "Oh, I, fell on a case of empties." You just know there's a story there.

- There's very little said on the commentary around the "Joe fucked Billy up the ass" scene. Must go read Hard Core Roadshow again.

- There's a very brief clip of Joe with the gun to his temple mid-acid-trip scene. And he keeps making these gun-to-the-head signs with his first two fingers all through the last concert.

- Don't know how many band houses there ARE in Edmonton. Must check with more music-scene-involved friends.

- I wonder how many HCL fans in the states were completely baffled by "Edmonton Block Heater." It's been recently brought to my attention that a great many people live in places where they don't need to plug their cars in over the winter. Lucky bastards.

There was more, I'm sure of it. But am suffering from massive low-blood-sugar headache, even after eating. Grrr. I know better, I do. Stupid self for not eating something sooner. Blergh.
daemonluna: default icon, me with totoros (Default)
So while looking for something else entirely, I came across a text file of all sorts of strange things said by people I know.

Like:

"So, what did the wompa eat before Luke came along, anyway?"
"Snow!"
"No, he ate Tauntauns."
"Then what did the Tauntauns eat?"
"Snow!"
(I know this one was post-SW-movie viewing. And it involved beanie SW critters, including a wompa. Other than that... *shrug*)


"It's not Gothic if nobody faints."
(My theory of gothic literature, derived from a full-year English course on gothic fiction and slave narratives. As I recall, it also involved lots of evil nuns and monks. The penultimate in gothic literature--fainting, evil, indescribable monks.)

"Y'know, I was thinking that while they're looking for the hand of Franklin, RayK is actually looking for the hand of Fraser. And y'know, he should probably look in his pants first."

"It's like VirginSlut!Obi! He's everywhere! I mean, how much does this boy lie? 'Ohhh, it's my first time,' he says to a million and one Qui-Gons."

"I would say you people are sick, but that would make me an extreme hypocrite."

When in doubt, when lacking an adjective, adverb, or personal pronoun, you can't fucking go fucking wrong with the fucking word fuck.
Dead!Joe as channeled by Barb, Ophelia's living room, 2am Saturday morning, Sept 22/00

Flashback to young and oh so stupid yet somehow oddly appealing and lickable and my GOD officer, I was sure they were eighteen, could you believe such young, innocent boys could use such LANGUAGE Billy and Joe...
Ophelia when outlining Graven Image, somewhere between 10pm and 2am, Sept 22/00

Because Barb knows everything. Up to and including the fact that cherry cough syrup doesn't make a very good lube. But you can't put that on a fucking resume, can you?
Barb, Sept 27/00

DaemonLuna: Slashers unite!!
Lunette339: You have nothing to lose but that guy's underwear.
Oct 1/00

Jane with Bertha Rochester. She feels a swelling of compassion for a suffering fellow-creature in her bosom, denounces Rochester, and nurses Bertha back to health. Rochester says screw it, goes off to bonk Bertha's brother what's-his-face, Edward, and they all live slashily ever after.
(I think this was my idea. I may actually write this, but that would involve re-reading Jane Eyre, now wouldn't it? Which I have read at least four times, and all but the first (back in high school) were school-related required reading *hitting head against wall*)

As this country's leading lawyer, it is my duty to protect the rights of lobsters.
RCAFarce, Oct 6/00

It was a platonic fuck up the ass!
Me, Nov 21/00 (I must have been talking about HCL...)

"Yahoo is evil. This is why we have a NCWPG."
"No, you have a NCWPG because you want a NCWPG. I'm not a complete idiot here."
Joan, Mar 2/01

Dief is happy with poodles and pastry. Fraser, he wants Chicago cops and pemmican.
Bindlechat, Mar 02/01

This is sex in a cup. This is GAY sex in a cup!
Barb and her white hot chocolate, Mar 3/01

I have a very tiny man hanging off my boob... it doesn't happen very often...
Jacquie on breastfeeding, Mar 9/01

Don't mess with my girlfriend, damn it, she's a fucking librarian and she'll dewey decimal your ass.
Barb, Mar 23/01

I haven't yet purchased a moose, but that doesn't mean I'm not looking for one on the side.
Dine, Bindlechat, Mar 31/01

Bindlestitch: Come for the perversion. Stay for the plushy moose.

"And it looks like the three worst fic are the three longest..."
"Not only can they not write, but they can't stop."
Joan, April 5/01

"If it's so evil, why can I get it in paperback for $9.99?"
re: the Necronomicon

"Being on a free server is like being a hooker's nymphomaniac significant other. You can't complain about what she gives you, because hey, you *need* it, and you're getting it for free. But oh, did I mention, she's a huge bitch?"
Livia, April 4/01

"I proceed gaily forward instead of going straight ahead."
Swiped from a sig file on Bindle

"I doubt that a calendar of nude children's authors would sell near as well as one of nude librarians."
(Okay, I have NO idea where I found this one, but I'd love to know...)

And something I came across more recently--Neil Gaiman on copyright and his books occasionally being posted online:

"No-one's ever done anything more than take the book or story down, occasionally -- very occasionally -- muttering something hopeless and grumbly like "information wants to be free!" as they do, but mostly being very pleased someone let them know that it was up there. ("No, that's pizza," I want to tell them. "Pizza wants to be free. Concentrate on liberating pizza from evil pizzerias. Information, on the other hand, really hates being free, and is never happier than when manacled to a wall, like Kirk and Spock in some piece of late 70s bondage-oriented slash fiction.")

Bwaha. To find the original reference, go here and either scroll down or just do a keyword search on the page for pizza.

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